Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
