This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
