Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
