Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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