you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
