He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
