Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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