Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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