Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
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