would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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