i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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