you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
