Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
