Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
