mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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