Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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