you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
