Having a random hookup so left but love u
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
i was born a porn star she said
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize
