Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
