Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
My vagina is officially offended.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
