Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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