He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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