Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
It's blow job season.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
