she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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