I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
