You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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