Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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