I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
