I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
