all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
