a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
