I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
