Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Michael Bay diarrhea
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
He felt like a one man threesome
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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