they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
