Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
