i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
