He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
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