wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize