I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
