I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Randomize
