why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
