new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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