But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Someone came in the potted fern
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
