Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Randomize
