Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
