After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He felt like a one man threesome
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
