i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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