i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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