There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
