okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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